The Ming Dynasty's henchmen, working from nine to five

Chapter 1 Leaving get off work on Time

"Brother Lang, we're almost at Yujing, aren't you nervous?"

"I've waited three years for this day. I'm too excited to be nervous!"

A donkey cart slowly made its way along the official road as the morning sun rose.

Shen Lang looked into the distance, a hint of anticipation in his eyes.

I remember it was three years ago.

On an ordinary morning, he woke up from his sleep as usual.

But when he opened his eyes, he found that the sky had fallen and he had come to a strange world!

Wearing pajamas, looking bewildered, he mingled in the crowd of refugees, shivering from the cold wind.

From starving refugees to today's reserve members of the Embroidered Uniform Guard.

After three years, he's finally about to make it big!

"I was so nervous I almost threw up!"

Qin Erniu drove the donkey, sighing and groaning, a tuft of hair on his head swaying left and right in the wind.

"My family even sold their pots and pans to get me into the Embroidered Uniform Guard. If I don't get selected, how will we survive?"

"Hey! Maybe I should register at the Eastern Depot too. We're already here, might as well have a backup plan..."

Shen Lang was teasing a strange parrot with gray feathers, a red tail, and darting eyes when he heard this, so he couldn't help but look up.

"If I remember correctly, to get into the Eastern Depot, you had to be castrated first, right?"

The grey-feathered parrot strode over to Qin Erniu's side, and with zero frames, it exclaimed, "Holy shit, fucking bastard!"

"You don't want the cow anymore?"

"Good dog, great job!"

"Get out, you crazy bird!"

After chasing the parrot away, Qin Erniu's face became even more bitter: "You know my family's situation."

"My brother died young, my sister-in-law is still young, and my mother is bedridden. My sister-in-law is the sole breadwinner of the family, so I have to step up!"

Shen Lang praised, "He's responsible; he's a real man!"

Qin Erniu sighed: "I'm not smart enough, and I can't understand martial arts. I only have brute strength, unlike you, Brother Lang, who is so capable and doesn't have to worry about anything."

"I'm an orphan. I only have to eat my fill, so of course I don't have to worry. What's there to envy?"

"You want to be an orphan too?"

Qin Erniu was in a daze, muttering, "The Eastern Depot pays a high salary, three taels of silver and one shi of rice a month. It's worth it to support the whole family by sacrificing me."

"We're not at our wits' end, why go to such lengths? Besides, would your sister-in-law agree to you joining the Eastern Depot?"

sister in law......

A graceful figure appeared in Qin Erniu's mind: a plump bottom and a slender waist beneath the coarse linen clothes, a smile that was full of charm.

"Waaaaah..."

The burly man, nine feet tall with arms long enough for a horse to run on, suddenly broke down, and little pearls began to fall.

The grey-feathered parrot tilted its head and shouted at the top of its lungs, "Qin Lao Er has slaughtered the cow!"

"He's lost his roots; his sister-in-law doesn't want him anymore!"

"Hehe, you big idiot!!!"

"Wah..." Qin Erniu pounded on the car floor and cried out in pain.

"Shut up."

Shen Lang tapped the parrot on the head, picked it up, and tossed it aside.

"Shut up too. The selection hasn't even started yet, so stop talking such discouraging things."

Qin Erniu sniffed: "Brother Lang, I know my own limitations."

"But you are different. Even the county magistrate said that you are the most capable constable he has ever seen. You will definitely be able to join the Embroidered Uniform Guard."

"But... Yujing is not like our countryside. After I finish my duties, I must not act recklessly again."

"What do I have to be willful about? I only do the work I'm paid for, and even if it were the King of Heaven himself, I'd still be in the right!"

Qin Erniu said worriedly, "Brother, who works only four hours a day and gets two days off every five days?"

"Do you still remember that time you went to the mountains to suppress bandits? You even had a knife to the bandit leader's neck, but you said it was time to get off work and turned around and left."

"The county magistrate was so angry that he fell into a coma for three days and almost died."

"If someone did this in the Embroidered Uniform Guard... wouldn't they get beheaded?"

"If we don't release him, how will we lure out his accomplices hiding outside? Besides, the magistrate didn't pay me overtime; I can't work for free!"

"But......"

"You're rambling on and on, it's unnecessary to bother with you. Just keep thinking about your sister-in-law and keep crying!"

Shen Lang dismissively said something and pulled the straw hat over his face.

"Qin Lao Er, sobbing!"

"That idiot who doesn't have a cow, his sister-in-law is laughing her head off!"

"Gaga, gaga gaga!"

"Sang Biao, shut up."

"Waaaaah... Waaaaah!!!"

......

Although Qin Erniu was a bit simple-minded, he was right about one thing: the capital and the countryside were indeed worlds apart.

Cars flowed like water and horses like dragons, and shops lined the street, with colorful flags fluttering in the wind.

"Brother Lang, Yujing is truly bustling!"

"Look at this road, how wide it is! Look at this street, how clean it is! Look at this sky, how blue it is!"

"Brother Lang, if I ever become successful, I'll definitely buy a big house here and bring my whole family over to enjoy a life of luxury!"

"Brother Lang, how much does this house cost? It must be at least several hundred taels, right?"

Qin Erniu looked left and right, finding everything new and exciting; he couldn't take it all in.

Shen Lang said lazily, "Tenfold it again."

"Ten times the price... several thousand taels?! That's so expensive?!"

Qin Erniu exclaimed in surprise, his back bending over instantly like a deflated balloon.

Shen Lang joked, "The Eastern Depot offers generous rewards. If you work hard, you'll be able to live in a mansion soon."

Qin Erniu sighed deeply again, then cracked his whip and lashed the donkey's rump to speed up the journey.

An hour later, the donkey cart arrived at the reviewing ground located in the sub-city.

"Brother Lang, wake up, we've arrived."

Qin Erniu tied up the donkey and shook Shen Lang awake, who was fast asleep.

"What time is it now?"

It's 1:15 PM.

"It's almost time to get off work!"

Shen Lang pushed himself off the donkey cart with one hand, stretched, and the gray-feathered parrot wobbled and flew to his shoulder.

"Shh, don't say anything out of the ordinary!"

Qin Erniu quickly pulled Shen Lang aside and pointed, "Look who's over there!"

Shen Lang narrowed his eyes and looked in the direction Er Niu was pointing. In the center of the training ground, a rammed earth platform stood majestically, surrounded by fluttering banners, exuding an imposing aura.

Three armchairs were placed on the high platform, with two men and one woman sitting inside.

The woman on the left wore a red dress, was alluring and beautiful, and always had a gentle smile on her fair oval face.

On the right is a fierce man clad in heavy armor, with no eyebrows, eyelashes, or hair, resembling an angry Vajra, extremely ferocious.

In the central position was a refined-looking man in a black robe, with an upright back and handsome features.

"Is the one in the middle the pacification commissioner of the Northern Garrison?"

Shen Lang was slightly surprised. It was just a recruitment drive for the Embroidered Uniform Guard, so why would they send out such a big shot?

"That's right, it's Lord Zhang Xian!" Qin Erniu whispered.

"I don't recognize those two next to me, but since they're sitting with the Garrison Commander, their identities must be quite impressive!"

"Why worry about so much? Let's go, let's get to the report!"

......

Half an hour later, the gates of the training ground were closed.

A Jinyiwei commander dressed in a black, close-fitting uniform stepped onto the high platform, bowed to Zhang Xian and the other two, and then announced in a loud voice:

"The time has come; the selection process officially begins. Those who are not present will be considered to have voluntarily forfeited!"

"Since you've come to participate in the selection for the Embroidered Uniform Guard, you must know the rules of the Embroidered Uniform Guard!"

"We are the Emperor's personal guard, our discipline is as firm as a mountain, and we cannot tolerate the slightest slackening!"

"Now, I will read out the military regulations!"

"Firstly, all must swear to be loyal to His Majesty to the death. Anyone who disobeys the imperial edict or deserts his post will be executed!"

"Secondly, those who abuse their power, solicit bribes, or embezzle funds will be dismissed from their posts and have their property confiscated; those whose actions are particularly egregious will be executed by slow slicing!"

"Thirdly, those who engage in favoritism, false accusations, or leak information about cases shall be beheaded and their five clans exiled!"

Fourthly...

Fifthly...

"Thirty-sixth, those who are slovenly in appearance or negligent in their duties shall be punished with eighty strokes of the cane; those who repeatedly fail to correct their behavior shall be beheaded!"

Qin Erniu tugged at Shen Lang, nervously saying, "Brother, isn't that what they mean by 'negligent on duty'—you?"

"Repeated offenses will be punished with immediate execution... Damn it, we can't afford to act recklessly like before!"

Shen Lang ignored him, moved half a step to the side, and focused on listening to the proclamation.

The rules of the Embroidered Uniform Guard were strict, with as many as 136 prohibitions.

As the shouts of "Chop!" echoed from the command platform, the atmosphere grew increasingly tense. The heads of the crowd drooped lower and lower, each one trembling with fear.

For a moment, the huge training ground was so quiet you could hear a pin drop.

However, at this very moment...

The grey parrot, which was preening its feathers just a second ago, suddenly moved!

It fluttered its wings and landed on Shen Lang's head, straining its neck and shouting, "It's time—"

"Off work!!!"